Session Three: What keeps my self-harm going?

Self-harm maintenance cycle

Does this cycle relate to you? Write your thoughts below

Making sense of self-harm

We have thousands of thoughts a day, some positive, some neutral and others more negative. These thoughts may happen automatically without our awareness whereas others (often the less helpful and more negative ones) can get a bit more 'stuck'. We all have negative thoughts from time to time but we know that the way we think has an impact on the way we feel (both emotionally and physically) and the behaviors we do.

Our thoughts, feelings and behaviors can become a negative cycle where the things we do to manage negative thoughts can make us feel worse in the long run. The good news is that a cycle can be broken and by making some changes we can start to turn a negative cycle into a positive cycle.

Let's look at an example together. Read what Sam has to say about the last time they self-harmed:

"It was Sunday evening... about 9pm I think. I'd been in my room all day because none of my friends were around. I felt lonely and bored so was just scrolling through my phone by myself. I could see pictures of other people doing fun things and looking happy. It made me feel sad because I don't have anyone to talk to. Everyone else seems happy when I'm not. I don't think anyone understands. I felt sick, was shaking and my heart was racing. I didn't want to get out of bed or see anyone. I ignored my friend's messages and cut my arms to try and feel better. The next day I felt angry with myself, like I'd let myself down."

Exercise nine: Mapping out Sam's Cycle

The situation:

Looking at Sam's cycle answer the following questions:

• Do you think this cycle is a positive or negative cycle?
• If the situation occurred again what do you think would happen?
• How do you think this cycle could be broken?
• Can any of these areas be changed?
• What do you think Sam could do differently?
• What advice would you give Sam?

The Situation: